Is the answer I’ve given to people when they ask me how long it takes to truly be over an ex partner. I’ve been separated from mine for a year and a half now and I’m still not over it.

We were together for eight years, we had a lot of good times and a lot of bad. I would say that the first four years were probably the best of our relationship but I never once stopped loving him, no matter what we argued about, how much he put me down or how many tears were shed. He finished it, and if I am honest it did come as a complete shock. Yes we argued a lot, but that was what we did, we always made up again afterwards.

That was the day that part of me died, but it was also the day that something ignited, sparked a fire inside of me and brought me to life as if I’d been born again, given a second chance. Yes I went off the rails for a bit, as most people do when they come out of a long-term relationship I think it is only natural to do so. But I soon came to my senses and realised that this was not the kind of person I was and I managed to stop myself from spiralling out of control and into depression.

Even though I had stopped all contact with him, I discovered that he had started a new relationship straight after our split, which hurt me very much. It just made me feel that he had no respect for me or our relationship what-so-ever. I on the other hand tried to avoid any kind of relationship with a man for several months. I even found it hard to trust male friends and decided it was better to build up a new circle of female friends that I could enjoy myself with and begin to trust.

It’s taken me a while to get here and although I still don’t feel completely ready for a relationship, I have managed to make some truly amazing friends. Both male and females and if I could turn back the clock and put everything right with my ex so that we didn’t break up I honestly don’t think I would. After all... It’s called a break up, because it’s broken.